亲,你的文章写得很好很用心!

　　祝诸事如意,鹏程万里!

　　Withthearrivalofmodernera,loveinmanyyoungs'eyesbecomemoreandmoreunnecessary.Inmyopinion,Itcan'tbedeniedthatparentsgiveuslife.However（这里没有转反转的逻辑关系,因此不能用however.建议把however改成Thepityis）,aswegrownup,theburdenonourparents

　　becamemoreandmoreheavily(这里要用形容词,不能用heavily,要用heavy).

　　Myfamilyisaveryordinaryfamily,andmyparentshavegeneraljobs.Frequently,whenIgotoschool,theygooutatthesametimeearly（atthesametime与early在逻辑上是矛盾的.建议将此句改为,theyhavealreadygoneforworking）.

　　Whentheygobackhome,theywillprepareforsupperwithoutanyrest.Aftersupper,theywas(注意单复数,这里要用were)

　　busywithhousework（缺少冠词,要么用thehousework,要么用houseworks）.

　　Until11o'clock,theyhavetimetohavearestbuttoolate.（逻辑上不对.翻译成中文就是“直到11点,他们有时间休息,但是太晚了”.建议改为,Theyhavenotimetorelaxuntil11p.m.,butthistimeisreallytoolate）

　　Iwants（我是第一人称,直接说want,不能说wants）

　　todosomethingforthem.（上一句和下一句之间要有过渡的逻辑词,建议加一个however在这里）I'mafraidIcan'tdocomplexthings.

　　Nevertheless,simplethingscanbecompetent.Ilearnthowtotidytherooms,（缺少必句内链接词,建议加上andto）buyfoodtocookandespeciallytakecareofmyself.

　　PlanisperfectbutIt'sdifficulttomove（move不能用来表示执行计划,建议此处用deliver.todelivertheplan是固定搭配）.

　　Butwithaperiodoftimetoadjustmyself,Ifoundtheskillstodealwith（缺少a.avarietyof是固定搭配）varietyofproblems.

　　Igain（时态要一致.亲前面用一般过去式,这里就要一致.用gained）alotandI'mproudofmyself.

　　Thehappyexpressionontheirface（单复数要一致.这里有两张脸,用faces）encourage（encouraged）me.

　　Parentstaughtusgrowandlove（句子成分不完整.shitaughtushowtogrowupandtolove）,

　　whatweshoulddomostisfeelgrateful(1.most在这里的适用错误,建议删除.2.缺少动词.这里要用whatweshoulddoistofeelgrateful).

　　Weshoulddowhatwecandonownot（把not换成insteadof）planwhattodointhefuture.