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  【给文章修改,提点意见(300字英文)Economyisconsideredasanimportantcriteriontoacountry’ssuccess.Butothersthinktherearestillotherfactorsthatcanmeasureacountry’ssuccess.Whatdoyouthinkareotherfactors?Whichismore】

  给文章修改,提点意见(300字英文)

  Economyisconsideredasanimportantcriteriontoacountry’ssuccess.Butothersthinktherearestillotherfactorsthatcanmeasureacountry’ssuccess.Whatdoyouthinkareotherfactors?Whichismoreimportantthaneconomy?

  Withtheamazingaccelerationofindustrializationandprosperityofeconomy,thepositionsofmanycountriesstretchfromthewell-beingsocietytomoredevelopedperiodthatitisneverundergone.Someeconomyexpertscontendthateconomyisconsideredasacrucialaspecttodeterminecountry’ssuccess.Quiteafewotherscientistsarguedthattherearemanyotherareasthatcanidentifywhetheracountry’ssuccess.Thepurposeofthisessayistoexplorethefactorswhichwillinfluenceacountry’ssuccessandpresentmyownopinionaboutwhichfactorismostimportant.

  Firstandforemost,themajorityofeducatorsbelievethatthequalityofeducationsystemisoneofthefactorstoinfluencecountry’ssuccess.Generallyspeaking,itisnodenyingthatthepowerofknowledgeisapreconditionofcountry’ssuccess.Thisisbecausethatprofessionaltechniqueinall-roundaspectscanbeimprovedbytheadvancedknowledge.Internet,forinstance,canencouragetheworldcommunicationandinternationaltrade,whichwillincreasethecountry’seconomy.Therefore,itcanbeconcludedthateducationcanbeconsideredasasignificantfactorstodetermineacountry’ssuccess.

  Anotherimportantaspecttomaintainacountry’ssuccessishealthcaresystem.Itisuniversallyacknowledgedthatmostpeoplewillprefertoconsideragoodhealthcareasaprincipleofcountry’ssuccessthatwillstabilizetheirliferatherthanacountry’seconomy.Tobespecific,bothinfantdeathrateandaveragelifespancanrepresentthesituationinacountrywhethersuccessornot.Obama,forexample,persuadethecongresstopassthehealthcareprotocol,whichwillchangethedetrimentalatmospherethatawealthofUScitizenscannotaffordthebasichealthcare.Hence,itcanbeconcludedthatagoodhealthcaresystemcandeterminedasuccessfulcountry.

  Tosumup,inspiteofthefactthatbotheconomyandhealthcaresystemarethecrucialfactorforasuccessfulcountry,thequalityofeducationsystemispredominantfactoramongthoseth

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2020-09-30 16:32
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洪求三

  第一段Economyisconsideredasanimportantcriteriontoacountry’ssuccess.Butothersthinktherearestillotherfactorsthatcanmeasureacountry’ssuccess.【这句话里有两个other,下一句又有other,读起来重复,可以改一下.】Whatdoyouthinkareotherfactors?Whichismoreimportantthaneconomy?【我觉得what比which好.】

  第二段Someeconomyexperts(写成economists也可以)contendthateconomyisconsideredasacrucialaspecttodeterminecountry’ssuccess.

  whetheracountry’ssuccess【我认为应该是:whetheracountryis

  sussess】

  whichfactoris【这里应该有个the(最高级,楼主忘了吧)】mostimportant.

  asasignificantfactors【factor没有s,单数形式】

  itisnodenying【应该是thereisnodenying,我不知道itis可不可以】

  第三段:oneofthefactorsto【不需要to,influenceacountry'ssuccess作定语修饰factors省略that】influencecountry’ssuccess.

  increasethecountry’seconomy【promote(促进)比increase(增加)好一点】

  第四段:thatmostpeoplewillprefertoconsider【删掉will,不用,多余而且不通顺】

  persuadethecongress……【应该是persuading,作主语,用动名词形式】

  个人认为,楼主一些词使用的频率有点高了,比如consider……可以换其他词代替,acountry'ssuccess也可以用it代替.

  有不对或有疑问的的地方,楼主一定要指出来,我们一起进步!

  2009.11.1220:07

  真抱歉!昨天没有看到你的消息.

  对不起.我漏看前面的Obama啦.是的是的,不应该改,应该加个ed

2020-09-30 16:34:01

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