【Momwasright!Ifyousaythankyou,foreventhesmallestgiftorslightestshowofkindness,you’llfeelhappy.Gratitude,saysRobertA.Emmons,aprofessororpsychologyattheUniversityofCalifornia,isanimportantelementofhappiness.】
Momwasright!Ifyousaythankyou,foreventhesmallestgiftorslightestshowofkindness,you’llfeelhappy.
Gratitude,saysRobertA.Emmons,aprofessororpsychologyattheUniversityofCalifornia,isanimportantelementofhappiness.Inhisrecenttook,Thanks!,Emmonsusesthefirstmajorstudyongratitudetoprovemom’spoint.Inacknowledginganddevelopingthismuch-ignoredexpressionofthankfulness,heexplainshowpeoplehavebenefited----evenimprovedtheirhealth.
Asoneoftheleadingscholarsofthepositivepsychologymovement,headmitsgratitudemaybedifficulttoexpress.Headvisesyoutobeginbyadmittingthatlifeisgoodandfullofeventsandelementsthatmakedailyexistenceawonder.Second,recognizethatthesourceoflife’sgoodnessismorethanjustyou.Thatsourcemaybeyourmom,afriend,partner,child,colleagueatworkorplay,oranycombinationofthese.
Gratitudeisalwaysother-directed,notesEmmons.Youcanbepleasedorangrywithyourselfandfeelguiltyaboutdoingsomethingwrong,butyoucanneverbegratefultoorforyourself.
Expressinggratitudeshouldn’tbeareaction;itshouldbeastateofmind.Tofeelgratefulwhenlifeisabreezeandyouhavemorethanyouneediseasy.Tofeelgratefulintimeofcrisis----anger,hatredandbitterness----iseasier.Also,toomanypeopleareawareoflife’sblessingsonlyafterthesearelost.
It’scrisisandchaos----danger,disease,disabilityanddeath----thatbringmanyindividualstorealizejusthowdependenttheyareonothers.Yetit’sthewayeachofusbeginslifeandendsit.It’stoobadthatsomanypeoplewastethosedecadesinbetweenlabouringundertheillusiontheyareself-sufficient,saysEmmons.
Theabundanceofvoicesexpressinggratitudefromhisstudiesofindividualswithchronichealthproblemsismany.ButEmmonsgoesbeyondhis“groundbreaking”sciencetomakehiscaseforgratitudebyincludingtheinspirationalwritingsofphilosophers,novelistsandsaints,aswellasthebeliefsofvariousreligionsandtheirrespectivescriptures.Takentogether,theseobservationsaresummedupquitenicelybyfamoushumanistAlbertSchweitzer,whosaidthesecretoflifeis“givingthanksforeverything.”
Toenableandembracegratitude,Emmonsencourage