英文幽默小故事能将1.5分钟以上最好
英文幽默小故事
能将1.5分钟以上最好
英文幽默小故事能将1.5分钟以上最好
英文幽默小故事
能将1.5分钟以上最好
Letmetakeitdown
Anelephantsaidtoamouse,"nodoubtthatyouarethesmallestzndmostuselessthingthatIhaveeverseen."
"Pless,sayitagain.Letmetakeitdown."themousesaid."IwilltellafleawhatIknow."
为我所用
一头大象对一只小老鼠说:“你无疑是我见过的最小、最没用的东西.”
“请再说一遍,让我把它记下来.”老鼠说.“我要讲给我认识的一只跳蚤听.
Anoldsoldieroftentoldhisgardenabouthispastwarexploits.
"OnceImetwithadozenenemysol-diersandtookthemprisonerssinglehand-ed."
"Itwashalfadozenenemysoldierswhenyoutoldmethestorylastyear.Butwhyhaveyouaddedsomanymorethistime?"
"Yousillylad.Youwereyoungerlastyear,andIwasafraidtofrightenyou."
Whilewisitingthecemetery,asorrowfulcouplenoticedaheadstone,whichread,"hereliesalawyerandahonestnan"."lookatthat",thewomansaid,"money'ssotightthey'reputtingthentwoinagrave."
LawyerJokes:
Amanvisitingagraveyardsawatombstonethatread,"HereliesJohnKelly,alawyerandanhonestman.""Howaboutthat!"heexclaimed."They'vegotthreepeopleburiedinonegrave."
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ThesearefromabookcalledDisorderintheCourt,andare
thingspeopleactuallysaidincourt,wordforword,takendownand
nowpublishedby
courtreporters-whohadthetormentofstayingcalmwhile
theseexchangeswereactuallytakingplace.
__________________________________
Q:Whatisyourdateofbirth?
A:July15th.
Q:Whatyear?
A:Everyyear.
Q:Howoldisyourson,theonelivingwithyou?
A:Thirty-eightorthirty-five,Ican'trememberwhich.
Q:Howlonghashelivedwithyou?
A:Forty-fiveyears.
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Q:Whatwasthefirstthingyourhusbandsaidtoyouwhenhe
wokeupthatmorning?
A:Hesaid,"WhereamI,Cathy?"
Q:Andwhydidthatupsetyou?
A:MynameisSusan.
_________________________________
Q:Howwasyourfirstmarriageterminated?
A:Bydeath.
__________________________________
Q:Isyourappearanceherethismorningpursuanttoa
depositionnoticewhichIsenttoyourattorney?
A:No,thisishowIdresswhenIgotowork.
__________________________________
Q:Doctor,beforeyouperformedtheautopsy,didyoucheckfor
apulse?
A:No.
Q:Didyoucheckforbloodpressure?
A:No.
Q:Didyoucheckforbreathing?
A:No.
Q:So,thenitispossiblethatthepatientwasalivewhenyou
begantheautopsy?
A:No.
Q:Howcanyoubesosure,Doctor?
A:Becausehisbrainwassittingonmydeskinajar.
Q:Butcouldthepatienthavestillbeenalive,nevertheless?
A:Yes,itispossiblethathecouldhavebeenaliveandpracticinglaw.
A:Nicetomeetyou.
B:Nicetomeetyou,too.
C:Nicetomeetyou,three.
AnArtist
Anartistaskedthegalleryowneriftherehadbeenanyinterestinhispaintingsondisplayatthattime.
"Ihavegoodnewsandbadnews,"theownerreplied."Thegoodnewsisthatagentlemanenquiredaboutyourw