sat作文修改.Whatmotivatespeopletoc-查字典问答网
分类选择

来自聂成龙的问题

  sat作文修改.Whatmotivatespeopletochange?Humanhavethebestandtheworthiestqualityatthesametime,andinmyopinion,theyallcomefromdesire.Becauseofdesire,peoplebegintoseek,tochase.Peopleallhavedreams,howevernoteverybodyisabl

  sat作文修改.

  What

  motivatespeopletochange?

  Humanhavethebestandtheworthiestquality

  atthesametime,andinmyopinion,theyallcomefromdesire.Becauseof

  desire,peoplebegintoseek,tochase.Peopleallhavedreams,howevernot

  everybodyisabletoachievethedream,andbecauseofdesire,peoplelearnto

  changethemselves.

  IdonotwanttodiscussiftheAmericaCivil

  Warwasrightorwrong,itwasalreadythehistory.Theslaverywasprevalent

  forover200years,peopleallknewitwasunfairandundemocratic.Intheend,

  thereasonwhythenorthernarmyfinallydecidedtobeginthewarwasthelack

  oflaborsoffactories,whiletheSouthownedalargenumberofslaverieswho

  havethepotentialtobecomefreelabors.AndaftertheEmancipationwas

  writtenduringtheCivilWar,thereasonwhylotsofslaveriesranawayandjoined

  thenorthernarmyriskingtheirlivesandhelpedtheNorthtofinallywinwasthat

  theywantthefreedom.TheNorthdesiredmorebenefits,whiletheslaveries

  desiredthefreedom.ThenorthernarmywonthebloodyCivilWar,andthe

  Americahistorywaschanged-theslaveriesweresetfree.Andnowwhenwelook

  atthewar,theresultisrelativelypositive-everyoneintheU.S.hasgota

  relativelyracialequalityandfreedom.

  Asitissaid,tochangeistorisk

  something.Peopleneverknowachangeispositiveornegative,but“desire”

  doeshavethestrength.Desireisabletomotivatepeopletochangethemselves,

  tochangepeoplearoundthem,thehistory,andeventheworld.

1回答
2020-12-29 06:36
我要回答
请先登录
孙艺红

  首先,worthiest是不是应该是worst.Peopleallhavedreams,howevernot

  everybodyisabletoachievethedream,andbecauseofdesire,peoplelearnto

  changethemselves.改成Eventhoughnoteveryoneisabletoacheivetheirdreams,becauseoftheirdesirefortheirdreams,peoplewilltrytochange.这里让步比转折更能表达你的观点.另外,你的第一个例子并不是changethemselves而是改变了大环境,所以change就够了.

  第二,例子选的不是很好,最好避免关于美国历史的讨论,因为你绝对不会比美国人更了解他们的历史,如果有错会大大地扣分的,因为这使得你的论据和论点并不互相支持.

  还有,字数太少了.至少需要两个例子,开头和结尾需要更详细的解释.比如Asitissaid,tochangeistorisksomething.前需要铺垫.Peopleneverknowachangeispositiveornegative,but“desire”doeshavethestrength不和主题.你在讨论motivationtochange而不是change是否正确.例子之前也需要过渡,大概就说两句像‘desire可以让人改编社会环境,就比如美国南北战争’之类的引入.

2020-12-29 06:39:58

最新问答

推荐文章

猜你喜欢

附近的人在看

推荐阅读

拓展阅读

  • 大家都在看
  • 小编推荐
  • 猜你喜欢
  •