在你另外那个里面答的,修改已经达到最大,所以发这来了.
童话恶搞太难了,还是直接写笑话好了.你要的词我给你花了横杠.
3.Abutcherisleaningonthecountertowardthecloseofdaywhenadogwithabasketinitsjawscomespushingthroughthedoor.
"An'wot'sthisthen?"heaskedhalf___insurprise___,halfmockingly.Thedogknocksthebasket___sharply___intothebutcher'sshins.
"Youdumbdog."Ashereachesdowntosmackthedog,henoticesanoteandatendollarbillinthebasket.
Thescribbleonthenoteasksforthreepoundsofhisbestmince[groundbeef].Thebutcherfiguresthisistooeasy.Hegoestothewindowandreachesforthedriedupstuffthat'sbeensittingoutallday.
Thedoggrowlsathim.Thebutchercouldn’tbemoresurprisedifitstartedraining___diamonds___,glaringatthepup,hegetsthebestmincefromthefridge.Weighingoutabout21/2pounds,hedropsinonthescalewithhisthumb.
"Hmmmmm,abitshy.Who'llknow?"
Again,thedoggrowlsmenacingly."Alright,alright,"ashethrowsonageneroushalfpound.Hewrapsitout,dropsitinthebasket,anddropsinchangefromafive.Thedogthreatenstochewhimoffattheankles.Anotherfivegoesinthebasket.
Thebutcherisquiteimpressedanddecidestofollowthepiddypuphome.Thedogquicklyentersahigh-risebuildings,pushestheliftbutton,entersthelift,andthenpushesthebuttonforthe12thfloor.Thedogwalksdownthecorridorandsmartlybangsthebasketonthedoor.Thedooropens,andthedog'sownerscreamsatthedog.
"Hey,whatareyoudoing?That'sareallysmartdogyou'vegotthere,you’renot___appreciating___himnearlyasmuchasyoushould"commentsthebutcher.
"He'sastupiddog--that'sthethirdtimethisweekhe'sforgottenhiskey
1.Thepooreconomyisaffectingthesupernaturalworldasmuchasthehumanone;decreasedhumanspendinganddecreasedhumanvacationsmeanslessfoodforthesebeingsthatfeastonblood.___Atpresent___,manyvampireshavesunktheirteethintopoverty.
Twovampirebatswakeupinthemiddleofthenight,thirstyforblood.Onesays,“I’msohungrythatIcan’tsleep.”
Theotheronereplies,“My__pockets__areemptyofgoldandmyfridgeofblood,wehavenothingelselefttoeat”
"Thenlet'sflyoutofthecaveandgetsomeblood."Thefirstonerespondsquickly.
"We'renewhere,"saysthesecondone."Wehaven’treceivedanytraining.We’renot__prepared___togooutalone.Let’swaituntiltheotherbatsgowithus."
Thefirstbatreplies,"Whoneedsthem?Icanfindsomebloodsomewhere."Hefliesoutofthecave.
Whenhereturns,heiscoveredwithblood.
Thesecondbatsaysexcitedly,"Wheredidyougettheblood?"
Thefirstbatturnedaround,hisbuddy___rapidly___followed.Stoppingatthemouthofthecaveandpointingintothenight,thefirstbatasks,"Seethatblackbuildingoverthere?"
"Yes,"theotherbatanswers.
"Well,"saysthefirstbat,"Ididn't."
2.Ablonde,outofmoneyanddownonherluckafterbuyingaglass_necklace__forthepriceofadiamondonebecauseitwasmoresparkly,neededmoneydesperately.Toraisecash,shedecidedtokidnapachildandholdhimforransom.
Shewenttothelocalplayground,grabbedakidrandomly,tookherbehindabuilding,andtoldher,"I'vekidnappedyou."
Shethenwroteabignotesaying,"I'vekidnappedyourkid