【请问我这句话有语法错误么?大家帮忙看看谢谢啦!However,childrenwhogrowupwiththetimeguidedtohaveahealthandperfectpersonalityisnotthesolereasonforthedestinyofsociety.孩子们被教育成健康优秀的品质】

　　请问我这句话有语法错误么?大家帮忙看看谢谢啦!

　　However,childrenwhogrowupwiththetimeguidedtohaveahealthandperfectpersonalityisnotthesolereasonforthedestinyofsociety.

　　孩子们被教育成健康优秀的品质并不是决定社会命运的唯一原因

　　However,thewaychildrenwhogrowupwiththetimeguidedtohavetheirownpersonalityisnotthesolereasonforthedestinyofsociety.改成这样行么教育孩子的方式并不是决定社会命运的唯一原因

　　或者把whogrowupwiththetime删了