求批改雅思小作文~我是新手,学了两节课,求批改!是图表题,表没有,就是请各位高手帮我看看语法和用词什么的~Thepiechartdescribesstudents'spendingondifferentthings,suchasrent,food,schoolfees,entertainmen

　　求批改雅思小作文~

　　我是新手,学了两节课,求批改!是图表题,表没有,就是请各位高手帮我看看语法和用词什么的~

　　Thepiechartdescribesstudents'spendingondifferentthings,suchasrent,food,schoolfees,entertainment,clothesandsoon.

　　Then,itcanbeseenfromthepiechartthatspendingforsixpurpose.Specitically,rentandfoodforthelargestoneis￡100ofthespendingwhiletheschoolfeescost￡90.Then,studentspends￡60onentertainmentforfun.Also,undergroundcostsentertainment25whiletheclothesrepresents￡20.Studymaterialsoccupys￡5

　　Therefore,itcanbeclearlyseenfromthepiechartthatrentandfoodaccountsforthegreastpartofspendingon.

　　只有一个饼图。有没有大侠帮我把语法错误圈一下啊，完事之后再加15分