求高人给作文打一下分,按高考标准,这篇是关于溺爱孩子的,满分-查字典问答网
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来自刘天田的问题

  求高人给作文打一下分,按高考标准,这篇是关于溺爱孩子的,满分25,Asitdepictsinthepictureabove,it’srainingcatsanddogsoutside,andyettheflowerisblossomingout.However,oncefacedwiththestormdirectly,theflowerca

  求高人给作文打一下分,按高考标准,这篇是关于溺爱孩子的,满分25,

  Asitdepictsin

  thepictureabove,it’srainingcatsanddogsoutside,andyetthefloweris

  blossomingout.However,oncefacedwiththestormdirectly,theflowercannot

  standagainstthestormanymore.

  Theprofound

  meaningofthepicturecanbeelaboratedintermsofthe“GreenHouse”phenomenon,

  whichpointesdirectlytothespoiledchildrenaswellastheirparents.Byno

  meansisthephenomenonuncommoninoursociety.Itseverelyresultedinwhat

  wecall“delicatechildren”.SoIdoreckonthatit’simperativetotakesome

  measuresbeforethesituationdeteriorates.Parentsshouldtaketheir

  responsibilitytomaketheirchildrenexposedtoauthenticsocietyand

  adversity,whichwilldefinitelycontributetothechildren’smentalhealthinthelongrun.

1回答
2020-06-13 11:13
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田爱民

  Hi,smartkidthere!

  youressayisreaaaalyimpressive!ImustsayIneverseeachildatyouragecapableofwritingsoorganizedandresonably.Bytheway,'rainingcatsanddogs'-----funnyusage!Niceshot

  Basically,nogrammarmistakesandadequatewordchoices.Oweyourhardwork,ofcourse.

  Yet,atinnypointmightneedtobeelaborated.Thefirstparagraphandthesecondoneshallbeconnectedmoreneatly.Thatmeansyoumaypointout'whoistheflower'and'whatthethunderstormstandsfor/symbolizes'Icancatchyourpointthere,butorganizingyouressaycoherentlyisprettyimportant.

  Thewordchoiceyoumakeisveryaccurateandauthentic.Ilovetheexpressionlike'delicatechildren''inthelongrun'andetc.

  SoIguess23/25mightbegoodenough.Keepthepaceonandmindtoconnectthepicturewithyourargument.

  Kyon,bestregards

2020-06-13 11:17:50

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